Fighting one's way through the forest 

A long time ago, my soul was a meadow, clear and flat. A place where you could see all the way to the horizon because there wasn't much to see.  

At some point, the machinery of chance dropped a seed capsule on this meadow – and since then, nothing has been the same. The meadow has given way to an untamed forest that grows more rampant with each passing day. Its trees sprout more branches, its grasses grow taller and its ravines grow deeper.  

Moving through this forest is exhausting and confusing. Every insight is soon covered by a vine. Reality and adaptation merge almost seamlessly. Memories become vague while you are still chasing after them. In the end, only the body remembers the traces of the past. 

Sometimes, while exploring this forest, I slip and fall into one of the ravines. Then I hope that I will hit the ground as soon as possible so that I can continue finding my way through this wilderness.  

Fruit is rare in this forest. Finding a fruit of knowledge is the ultimate goal of every such journey – a piece of the self. But most of the fruit one finds is vague illusions, shadow plays. Evasion tactics of our soul, which does not want to reveal too much about itself – not even to ourselves.  

At some point, ones stumbles out of this wilderness back into ones body, scratched and tired. But sometimes also enriched by a realisation, an insight or a memory. If ones does not become part of the wilderness oneself, if ones does not lose oneself, these journeys can be very valuable.  

Self-deception and avoidance are so intensely intertwined with the difficult moments in life that it would probably take hundreds of SORK models to break them all down. This overgrown forest is frightening, and rightly so.  

But to ignore its existence is to be blind to the fact that its vines are already entwining our feet and will soon have us in their grip. Questioning the reason for its existence, on the other hand, is the first step towards becoming the author of our own story again, instead of letting it be dictated to us.